How’s that title for all of my Candace Owens fans? [wink]
But seriously — have you ever received information and immediately wished you could un-hear it? I have. More times than I care to admit lately.
If this has happened to you — if you know something you absolutely do not want to know — what do you do?
First and foremost, we do not want to be a gossip. If you’ve received information about someone’s personal life or relationship, there is a time to stay in your lane… and possibly a time to reach out.
Let me give you some examples.
Small town scenario: Jane heard from Sally, who heard from Mike, who heard from Tom, that Bill met a red-headed lady in the park.
Okay. Clearly this is a gossip train that just needs to die with you. Too many cooks in the kitchen. Too far down the line. Not fact-based. Let it die. Otherwise, you just become another link in the chain — and potentially label a gossip yourself.
Now, on the other hand…
Someone extremely close to you informs you of a factual situation that occurred. There were witnesses. The event has resulted in a mass cover-up. You were told because you know the parties. You know their children. You attend the same church. You see them in the community often.
And if there is truth — someone needs to know.
What do you do then?
First — do not spread gossip. Do not talk. Do not share. Unless it is with an extremely close confidant — an outside best friend or therapist — someone who can give you wise, grounded advice.
Second — confirm the facts. Let me repeat that: confirm the facts. The last thing you want to do — especially if you feel called to share information with those involved — is bear false witness.
Now you have confirmed the facts. You have confirmed the truth.
Do you stay in your lane and pretend you don’t know? Or do you find a way to share this information peacefully and respectfully?
This is where I anticipate divided lines.
As I mentioned, I was recently the recipient of knowledge I didn’t want to know. In one scenario, I let it go in one ear and out the other. It was small-town “he said, she said,” and the fact that I was even being told did not bear fruit.
But in the other scenario, I made a different choice.
I am a God-fearing woman. I trust the Lord. I stand for truth. I have been the recipient of lies. I have also been the recipient of everyone in a small town knowing… but me.
I wasn’t going to let that happen to someone I know — or their children. I wasn’t going to let them walk into church while people looked at them with pity in their eyes. Trust me when I say there is nothing more humiliating than finding out months later that many people looked you in the face and knew.
So I reached out to someone even closer to the family than I was — someone I trusted to confirm the facts and share the truth gracefully, which she did.
Now we pray for them. Pray for their family. Pray for healing in whatever form the Lord has planned.
These situations are rarely simple, and they are never easy. I don’t pretend to have every answer – only conviction to follow truth when the Lord nudges my heart.
Every single day, you have a choice. You can choose good. Choose honesty. Choose to be the light. Or you can feed the darkness, spread the lies, and sew unhealthy seeds.
Be the light. Move away from deception. Even when conversations are hard, the truth will win every single time.
God Bless, friends.
~ Stace
If you want to dive deeper, here is a book that aligns with the message.
The Truth About Lies by J. Mack Stiles
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